Assignment+2.9

.My first draft will be about how the Dominican R epublic could change their ways of living. They live in really bad conditions, about 95% of Dominicans are poor and they really need improvements. The whole country is in danger of breaking apart. Geographically, they should have science experts check the possibility of D.R breaking apart and try and help the country. About 75% this famous and beautiful country called Dominican republic will be not be existing no more if this damages still keep happening.

Storms on Dominican Republic are a really big thing because a lot of families die because of how strong they are. Many people lose everything because of the storm and they really need all the country and all the government to give support to try and make the Dominican Republic a better place. We need more authority and security because there are a lot of crimes happening and I believe we have the power to stop them but we have to do it together

Education in the Dominican Republic is really bad because the things they provide in public school s is not enough. If a child is having a good education it’s because they go to a private school. The public schools in the Dominican Republic are bad because I think we would have a good education and a good amount of materials if the government would spend their money wisely instead of using it on unnecessary things. ( ß I rephrased it for you; it was a run on sentence. I tried fixing it) We need the future children to have a good education so they can know what they are doing and be prepared to face the world. The current workers in this generation will have to retire so this is a big deal on Dominican Republic. If you want to get a good education you have to go to a private school, I think that is not fair because we should all have the same education. I also think the Dominican Republic should get together with Haiti, maybe since they relate then they could get some new things like better benefits and better education. We can prevent or fix many disasters like this by putting both governments together and making an agreement. They can get together to put an amount of money where we can help Dominican Republic and some other countries that really need the money like Haiti, they are both having serious problems.

The United States and Europe are the richest countr ies, they should be able to help the Dominican Republic with these types of problems that we are having. There should be a law where every country that has money, gives at least some amount of repair the countries that need it.

This will help a lot because they are not only giving money they are helping a really poor country. We really need the money to repair homes where poor people live. It’s a hard life out there and they should be able to have every right to have a good life and some good improvements. Jean, your essay has some really good points. I just feel like you don’t ever use periods! You have a lot of run-on sentences and I didn’t see any quotes. But other then that, just fix your essay up and maybe use some of my suggestions if you want. I rephrased a lot of things for you. ß Natalie