Armando-+first+draft+of+English+essay

Armando Martinez First draft

Tehcnology is a big part of society it can save human lives or it can take away human life depending on,  what is the purpose of that technology piece. Technology can be used in many different ways (AN EXAMPLE WOULD BE NICE ). There are many kinds of technology like cell phones, ipods, game systems like the playstation 3, xbox 360, computers, and many more. A ll these devices have different functions and can be used for many different things. (Again you can evaulate) Technology is something that is used every day and used by everybody for different reasons. (Such as...? ) Technology is used to create electronics (another type of technology), medical technology that can be used to perform surgeries to save lives. They're also used to create things we can use and need like phones for communication and cars and planes used to travel. Technology is used to create many kinds of things that are helpful to humans to over come obstacles. (You repeat yourself here, but you can explain this or remove this from the paragraph) <span style="color: rgb(6, 101, 101);"> (You can go more into detail about what tech. your talking about.) Technology is very helpful, technology can provide jobs for people that don’t have jobs. <span style="color: rgb(6, 101, 101);">(you keep repeating yourself) For example people can become programmers and make apps for <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">devices such as the iphone or ipod touch and sell them on the apple store. <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">P eople have been making money by<span style="color: rgb(0, 255, 0);"> sellin<span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">g apps online. "But after reading a few get-rich-quick stories about programmers making good money from selling applications designed to run on the iPhone or iPod Touch, he decided to give it a go. How hard could it be?".<span style="color: rgb(6, 101, 101);"> (who is this he? explain much more) you can make what you make in 4 months in a week. "In one week, I made what I would've made in four months," he said. "That's when I decided to pull the trigger." Apple is providing the programmers tools to make new apps. "[|Apple] Inc. said it will give programmers a range of new tools they can use to build software for its iPhone. The company also unveiled features for the phone users have said are long overdue, including the ability to copy and paste text." Because of this many programmers have been able to make money in these hard times by selling apps in the apple store<span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">". <span style="color: rgb(0, 255, 0);">(Mention some other type of jobs such as mechanics)  Technology can be used in both good and bad ways. A good way technology can be used is medical technology that can be used to save lives and a bad way technology can be used is in cyber crimes like identity theft over the internet when buying online things. <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">Cyber criminals have easy <span style="color: rgb(0, 255, 0);">acces to the internet in <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">Brazil the main cyber crime country. "Access to the web is easy thanks to the cheap internet cafes studded around the suburbs of Brazil's economic hubs - where most young people use them to play games or educate themselves"cyber crime is growing rapidly. " Cyber crime's turnover has been growing rapidly ever since, so that now estimates of its value stand at that huge $100 billion figure <span style="color: rgb(0, 255, 0);">annual "the article states- Cyber crime - internet banking and credit card fraud - is now the fastest growing sector of global organized crime, increasing at a rate of about 40% per year. With Brazil thought to have by far the largest number of cyber criminals. Technology can be used either good or bad depending on the intent of the person.<span style="color: rgb(6, 101, 101);"> (Where do you get the numbers from?) Technology is very important to people because a lot of people use cell phones and electronics like the <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">X box 360 and <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">P laystation 3.<span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(Give some backround on the gaming system) People use cell phones to communicate and to text and browse the internet. <span style="color: rgb(0, 255, 0);"> <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">P eople also use the computer for business purposes and to entertain themselves. Computers can be used for many things like searching up things on the internet to designing building and cities. Technology is very important to people it can help people a lot but technology also has a downfall. Technology can be used In many different ways.<span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">(Remove this sentence you repeated yourself way too much) Technology helps mankind progress and advance every day by helping us discover new things. . <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);"> juan <span style="color: rgb(255, 0, 0);">Essay is good but try not to reapet yourself to much good start and great pictures good topic. <span style="color: rgb(0, 255, 0);"> <span style="color: rgb(6, 101, 101);"> <span style="color: rgb(0, 255, 0);">Good details and information but just state your sources to backup the information -Erick <span style="color: rgb(6, 101, 101);">

Essay is alright be more especific about where do you get your numbers and ideas from.